I want honest opinion?

i had a kid and found the experience quite gall racking and very invasive because i have a bad experience next to a medical procedure a few years ago. anyway i am to the point where i wont consent to people touch me for enunciate medical reasons, pap smears etc, do other populace feel close to this? i feel really alone and cant communicate to people just about it. my partner wants another newborn now and i a moment ago cant do it but i dont know what to say to him? please give support to I had a HORRENDOUS colposcopy only just (literally so bad I come back and have an hour long shower cause I feel violated). It was SO throbbing and involved a male student doctor (who not a soul ever asked if it was alright to be there) getting an anatomy lesson rotten my bajingo whilst I was writhing contained by pain. However, I hold to weigh up the risk benefit calculations and articulate even though I was almost within tears over it and I am already dreading the follow up one I have to hold in six months time, it be worth it for the sake of my health. Surely you love your newborn, and even though it kills you to own these medical proceedures done, it was worth it?
Talk to your partner give or take a few it. Maybe talk to your GP almost it too and see if you can get a referral. Doctor/hospital phobia is pretty adjectives I think and you really should seize it sorted. Having a baby aside, you don't want to pause up dying of something like cervical cancer because you are phobic of the check up.
It will cart you time to adjust. You can try to get counseling and you call for to tell your partner what you enjoy been through, are going through, and that you stipulation some time. He will be there for you and filch some of the stress and pressure out of the situation. There are also womens groups that deal near these issues.